I am a list maker. It's obsessive, controlling, rigid, but I love a good list. From the sheer anticipation of creation through to the calm once it's done, the satisfaction can't be underestimated. My lists contain the things I have to do, a clear structure of tasks waiting for me.
But this list is backwards. Rather than all my to-dos, it's my "done in the last three months list" and it's one of my best yet:
- Seen my youngest child turn 1
- Taken 18 flights
- Slept in 6 different hotels
- Returned to work from maternity leave
- Had one family funeral
- Gotten up multiple times a night with my kids more times than I can remember
- Had a chest infection and asthma attack
- Stopped breastfeeding
- Had my dog's cancers removed
- Bought a house
- Started a business
- Lost 12.8 kilos
- Ran 10 km at the Melbourne Marathon
- Changed the way I approach my life
The reason this list is so important is because once I would have let all the things at the top be the reason I couldn't do the things at the bottom. I would call them barriers - you can call them excuses. But with everything going on in my life something always had to give - and that something was my health.
I knew it was bad. The sneaky chocolate bar on the way home from the supermarket, the closet full of clothes that don't fit anymore, the photos you don't look at so you don't see the issue. I had them all. And I had the excuses. I'd just had a baby, I was busy, I didn't get enough sleep. I'd tried and failed before.
But the points at the bottom of my list are proof anyone can make a change. With the help of my trainer Leigh-Ann, I've set goals that I thought were beyond me and smashed through them. I've changed the way I think about food, the way I eat, shop, cook and my attitude towards myself. From the first day I went into the studio I've been supported to change my life. And it was confronting. But the scary part wasn't the scale (although it wasn't kind) - it was the unhealthy picture my first Bio-Scan painted of me. With two small children, I need to be around for them. To do that, I need to change me. And I needed help. Luckily my best friend took me to Vision Camberwell.
The team at Vision have helped me change the way I live. From taking my own food onto planes, through to having my kids in the gym so I can train, they've supported me through my situation to make it work. I lost 11kgs in my first 9 weeks and while my trainer keeps me on track, everybody in the gym from the other trainers to the awesome clients are invested in my journey. And most of them have also held the baby at some point.
It's not always been easy. I get up early to go to the gym even when the baby wakes 4 times a night. I pack my trainers and walk strange cities to get my cardio in. I once took a steak and veggies to the football instead of having a pie. I've gotten off planes at midnight and met Leigh-Ann at 6am. And I passed up the pork belly rolls in meetings to eat my roast chicken.
There is a gym I drive past with a large banner that says "busier people than you are working out right now". And I think about that at lot. I have a busy, full life. And I'm extremely grateful for it. But it's honestly so much better now that I'm healthy, fit and emotionally taking care of myself.
My lists are still be written. But now there are new ones. Full of the healthy food my family will eat. The next event I want to enter. The new clothes I plan on buying. I know that no matter what ends up on my "to do" list, I've got the skills to make sure staying healthy is always on there.