The Culture of Alibi*

Thursday, 6 September 2018, By Robbie Mattei

 

What happens when it feels like your goals you set some time ago look so far from being achieved?

Your first goal session, you were so pumped and motivated to make the changes required to make it all happen. Was it you that said you would make the required amount of training to reach that very goal? Was it you that agreed to make the group sessions a part of your weekly routine? You said you were going to make it even when work was busy.

Now let's speak about what happened to all those alcoholic drinks over the weekend?

You said you wanted me to keep you accountable to no more than 4 drinks per week. You asked me to, I didn't impose it on you.

What has stood in the way of completing your food diary? Did you not say that it was important to hit your macronutrients because when you do, your weight goes down? Second to the weight it helps you eat better and therefore feel better?

I texted you 3 times over the last week and you have never replied to me.

Did you not say that accountability was important for you?

What happened? Tell me more about that.

 

HOW FRUSTRATING ARE THESE QUESTIONS?

For how much they are frustrating you, these questions are being asked for a reason, and the reason is simply to stimulate something inside you that makes you aware of how you are going through your journey towards your goals.

During your journey, you are required to get out of your comfort zone. This comfort zone is what put you in this very situation to start with. Completing your food diary is a vital element of the process so you are aware of what you eat and drink. Achieving your hard intensity cardio sessions on your own, with your trainer or in Group Training Sessions so we can boost the metabolism and have your body really firing! Again, it won't be comfortable but changes create changes.

What makes your journey so difficult?

If you are doing everything you have agreed and planned for in your Goal Session, how could you possibly fail to achieve your goals?

What steps can we put in place together in order to reach your compelling goals?

The first victory that we all should celebrate, is acknowledging a terrible enemy, one that hides itself and we never want to fight. This enemy is our limits, our barriers, all the things that are not exactly going our way & those things we simplydon't like.

This is the first victory. Having self-reflection and seeing ourselves as though we are looking down from above or from the third person gives us a chance for improvement without the pain of going through the changes and provides us opportunity to have quality in what we do.

After this first victory, we can definitely say that we own a winning mindsetdue to our readinessto beat our limits and overcome them. However, this is just the first part of the journey, we have acknowledged what we need and are prepared to do and we are now ready to take the next step.

The second phase is winning against the difficulties. They can come from different angles of our life: the weather, family, health, work etc.

Everybody can explain why they haven't done a certain thing they were supposed (or promised themselves) to do. Not many do it despite the difficulties.

Not being able to win against the difficulties takes us into "the culture of alibi". This means we are trying to give ourselves a reason why we have failed.And this reason was (obviously) not coming from us, it was not our fault. Or was it?

By making use of the culture of alibi, we eliminate the chance to accept the feedback that is the basis of learning. The mistake is not utilising our new realisations that changes do need to be made in our life and in our habits but instead letting the excuses, and even more excuses, stop us from proceeding with our opportunity to learn and improve.

Are you ready to look into yourself and analyse your personal situation?

Are you ready to take steps to modify your mindset and your lifestyle?

Are you ready to let go of blame, excuses, denial and playing the victim?

Are you now ready to take ownership, accountability and responsibility for what you do and play the Victor?

Are you really ready?

Remember: a loser finds excuses; a winner finds a way.

Robbie

*Disclaimer: Individual results vary based on agreed goals. Click here for details.

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